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10 Hilarious and Bizarre Gay Porn Stars Named After Real People

aiden_shaw

In an essay for Buzzfeed entitled What’s In A (Porn) Name, Conner Habib discusses the repercussions his porn name had on someone whose real name also happens to be Conner Habib. He goes on to eloquently explain the need for porn names in the first place:

Porn performers pick their stage names for different reasons, but the most common idea is that if you create a name, you create an identity. That identity is a thin veil that’s supposed to help you avoid job discrimination in the future, prevent your family finding out, protect you from certain overzealous viewers who may think they have a relationship with you that oversteps the boundaries you’re comfortable with, and more.

Despite the parlor game that dictates one’s nom de porn be the name of your first pet and the street you grew up on, the actual method is usually far less scientific. Usually it’s the name of a teenage crush or something that “sounded sexy”. Despite having Google at our fingertips, they often unknowingly pick something that’s already taken. Sometimes the juxtapositions are hilarious: Here’s a list of my ten favorites.

Derek Parker Gay Porn Star and astrologist

10. Derek Parker … British astrologer
The non-porn Parker is one of the foremost authorities on astrology in the world. Frequent TV and radio guests, Parker and his wife Julia have written numerous books on the subject, most notably The Compleat Astrologer, which has sold over one million copies and been translated into 17 languages.

 

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9. Samuel Colt: Gunslinger
Although he didn’t technically invent the revolver, the original Samuel Colt revolutionized gun manufacturing and supplied firearms to both the North and the South during the Civil War. He was able to parlay his wartime earnings into a massive empire which bears the Colt name to this date. When he died in 1862, he was one of the richest men in America.

 

michael_brandon
8. Michael Brandon: Veteran Hollywood actor
The Michael Brandon without Monster between his legs has been acting since the 70s, and recently had a part in the biblical cartoon “Veggie Tales”. In addition to dating screen legend Kim Novak, Brandon was married to the Bionic Woman herself, Lindsay Wagner, for a few years in the 70s.

 

benjamin_bradley
7. Benjamin Bradley: Slave turned inventor
Lily-white porn star Benjamin Bradley is definitely not the Benjamin Bradley who was born a slave in Maryland in 1830. At age 16, the young prodigy built the first steam-powered war ship out of scrap metal, and although he unable to patent it due to laws which prohibited slaves from registering patents, he was able to use the proceeds to pay his slave master to make himself a free man.

 

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Ben Andrews photo (L) courtesy of LucasEntertainment.com

6. Ben Andrews: Super math genius
The massive organ on this Ben Andrews is his brain: As a senior fellow at the Centre for Mathematics and Applications at the Australian National University, he wrote a PhD thesis on evolving convex hyper surfaces. His interests include differential geometry associated with conformal transformations, projective transformations, affine transformations and other groups and semi-Riemannian geometry.

gay porn star Aiden Shaw and Aiden Shaw from Sex and the City
5. Aiden Shaw: TV Boyfriend
Here’s one case of art imitating porn. Openly gay “Sex and the City” creator Darren Star apparently was such a big fan of the super-hung British stud that he named one of Carrie Bradshaw’s boyfriend (played by John Corbett) after him.

ralph_woods
4. Ralph Woods: Theologist
A professor of theology and literature at ultra-conservative Baylor University in Texas, Professor Woods focuses on the “Christian angle” of the major literary works of the 19th and 20th century. He also edits “Christian Century”, a magazine that “explores what it means to believe and live out the Christian faith in our time.” Surely he’s a big fan of his gay porn counterpart.

anthony_romero

3. Anthony Romero: Executive Director of the ACLU
Like the gay porn star with the same name, Anthony Romero is openly gay and Latino. Unlike him, however, he’s served as executive director of the American Civil Liberties Union since 2001, where he has worked tirelessly to oppose Bush’s terrorist surveillance program.

 

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2. Dale Cooper: Fictional FBI AgentI always thought the porn star’s name sounded familiar … and then it finally hit me: Agent Dale Cooper was the quirky FBI agent played by Kyle MacLachlan in the 1989 cult classic show Twin Peaks. I wonder how porn’s Dale Cooper feels about cherry pie? [Update: Dale confirmed via Twitter that he did name himself after the Twin Peaks character:]

 

 

jeff_stryker
1. Jeff Stryker: New York Times and NPR contributor:
One of the most iconic names in porn is shared by a mild-mannered Connecticut-based writer who specializes in stuff like health policy and bioethics, on which he’s written for the New York Times, Salon, and The Nation. Frequently mistaken for the porn star, it says “NOT THE PORN STAR” across the top of his website  in huge letters. His site probably does get a lot of traffic though.

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19 Responses to “10 Hilarious and Bizarre Gay Porn Stars Named After Real People”

  1. Jett Blakk says:

    I also like TONY SCALIA, who told me he named himself after a certain ultra-conservative Supreme Court Justice out of pure spite.

    JB

    • Shamama says:

      JBK-

      That’s pretty funny. A friend of mine filmed an amateur scene under the name “Dick Cheney”. He probably has an FBI file on him now!

  2. Monk says:

    There was a performer quite a few years ago who called himself BEN BARKER, after Sweeney Todd’s real name, Benjamin Barker

    • Shamama says:

      Monk-

      I’m sure that went over most people’s heads (including mine .. and I love Sondheim!)

      This list is just my top ten favorites; Unfortunately I had to omit a lot of good ones like Dred Scott and Jake Ryan (the protagonist in Tom Clancy’s “Hunt For Red October” novels).

  3. sxg says:

    I’m surprised you didn’t mention Titan Men’s former power top Dred Scott is named after this guy http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dred_Scott.

    Oh I would have loved to have Titanmen’s Dred Scott destroy my ass!

  4. Casey says:

    Dale Cooper is my favorite of these names. That’s when I knew the gay porn star Cooper was one cool cat.

  5. Bobby Knight says:

    I had no idea that my name was also the name of some crazy basketball coach! They even mentioned me by accident on twitter instead of him once!

    “Scott Simon ‏@nprscottsimon 28 Feb
    Interviewed Bob Knight & he astonished me by not cursing, throwing chair. Btw, @TheBobbyKnight acct? Not a beloved Hoosier.”

  6. Samuel Colt says:

    I was actually inspired in part by Dred Scott to pay homage to history and in part to borrow from the name recognition of a name everyone (most likely) has heard of yet my not exactly know who they were or what they did. (Reference this tweet by Cher https://twitter.com/cher/status/229808214764552193

    However the unexpected consequence was that I also get confused with the character on Supernatural also named Samuel Colt. Or rather, he often gets confused with me… http://samuelmuscle.tumblr.com/post/51559139489/i-decided-to-go-to-the-samuel-colt-tag

  7. alex says:

    Am I the only one puzzled as to why this list of “Real People” includes fictional characters?

    Three others: Jacob Young, Marcus Allen, Jimmy Johnson

    • Shamama says:

      Point taken, Alex: Gold star for you! I tried to keep the list to “real” people, but the stories behind Aiden Shaw and Dale Cooper were too funny to omit.

  8. Ravenix says:

    The 19th century Benjamin Bradley sounds so interesting. The first black steampunk!

    I suppose lots of porn stars name themselves after unreal people. My favorite is the comic book writer/artist who does movies under the name “Steve Trevor” after Wonder Woman’s occasional toy boy. (Played by Lyle Waggoner in the TV show.)

  9. Fernando Torres says:

    What about me? My fans used to google me looking for photos of my round butt, freckled nose and flaxen hair, and now they get some roided up South American into double penetration.

  10. Kyle says:

    There’s a Spencer Reid on Criminal Minds, there’s way too many dumbasses on tumblr getting pissed off when they spell it Spencer Reed.

  11. [...] Related:1o Hilarious and Bizarre Gay Porn Stars Named After Real PeopleModern Hipster … or Vintage Gay Porn Star? [...]

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